I can relate to your problems with lenses and accessories that have odd filter threads. I recently bought a lens hood for a 50mm f2 Ultron lens used on the old Voigtlander Prominent rangefinder camera and found that this particular hood has internal female threads instead of external male ones that might be found on a normal screw in hood. The threads were 49mm diameter so it does not directly help you in any way least of all with filters. And I did not plan to use it with an Ultron (which I have long sold) But I like the look of the hood when mounted on certain other classic lenses. The hood is pictured below just for interest - and grins as you say.
This was an easy conversion fix for me as I readily found on eBay a male to male
49mm adapter for a few pennies. (No laughing please about male to male adaptations!
) By screwing the adapter into the female threads on the hood it effectively converted the hood into a normally configured one. (There seem to be a few iterations of this hood BTW. Some have a clamp fit and another has a friction fit - not sure why mine is different again).
Female to male step up ring adapters can also be found on eBay and these may fix your lens problem allowing you to use normal filters, normally mounted. Assuming of course that the thread pitch on the adapter is the same as on your lens - it sounds as if this is possibly a further part of your problem though..........??
Use this search term in the eBay search box and you will at least get some hits: "55mm female to male adapter". If you can't find one in the size you need (I am assuming it is 55mm) you could also use a normal step ring to double with whatever you do get.