Our Self Perceptions

[Timmyjoe]

As little kids we're taught to "Never judge a book by its cover" when meeting new people. But as photographers of people, we try to convey who a person is, but our only canvas is their "cover".

Been thinking about this a bit lately as my "cover" has changed as a result of cancer treatment. And I can't get over how it has made me feel different or a bit alien to myself whenever I happen to see my reflection.

This is the "cover" I've known for fifty four years, with my straight dark brown hair.



This is my "cover" now, after surviving chemo.



Feel like Greg in the "perm episode" of Brady Bunch.

Can't get over how such a seemingly minor change in appearance can skew self perception.

Best,
-Tim

[Andrea Taurisano]

Tim, I haven't been in that situation but think I have at least a faint idea of what that feels like (I've actually never perceived my "cover" in a specially flattering way). The cause of that change in your "cover" will let you enjoy the love of your family and friends and share your passion for photography with us for many years ahead. You can be proud of that.

[ricnak]

Tim.

Sorry to hear about the need for cancer treatment.

I think your "new" hair suits you. Add a smile to that second shot.

Cheers

Helen

[dave lackey]

Hi, Tim!

When such a personal post comes up like this, I am naturally compelled to read it. When I see you baring yourself and your emotions, I am naturally impressed.

I like both photos! You are vertical! You look like you are doing pretty good, and that is a good thing.

Sorry about the situation and the chemo and all of the side issues that go along with it. My thoughts and prayers go out to you

In the meantime, your cover is blown, now get out and enjoy yourself with the freedom that comes with it. You look great! You look like a photographer!

[oftheherd]

I am also sorry that you had to go through that. But you are now something that you never were before; a survivor!

I've never done chemo, but I did do two rounds of radiation. It saps your strength, or at least it did mine. If fact it was quite some time before the summer heat stopped bothering me. It never had before.

But as everyone has said, your "cover" doesn't look bad now, even if it wasn't you for all those years. Be a survivor, continue to take photographs and enjoy the company of others who like to take photographs. That's who you really are.

EDIT: BTW, what camera is that you are using? I don't recall having seen one with so many windows on the front.

[Timmyjoe]

Thanks everyone, for your support. I really appreciate it. Am doing good, still don't have as much energy as pre-cancer, but as we used to say in chemo, "Everyday you wake up above ground is a good day."

The visual thing has been catching me off guard lately, and being photographers, who deal with the visual thing 24/7, I thought I'd share my observations.

Originally Posted by oftheherd

BTW, what camera is that you are using? I don't recall having seen one with so many windows on the front.

That's my M8.2. Been black gaffer's taping over the logos on my Leica's for decades as I found that red dot distracts people.

Best,
-Tim

[paulfish4570]

i feel your visual pain, tim. my hair came back curly, too. but in a couple of months, the curl was gone, and my normal straight hair was back. hey, you've got hair. my bride's hair never did fully return at all.
it will take a good long while to feel like you used to, pre-chemo, maybe a year or so. looks like you will get there ... joshua 1:9.

[Timmyjoe]

Hey Paul,

Yeah, I know you've been through this. Thanks for the encouragement.

Best,
-Tim