bmattock
01-22-2004, 08:02
On Monday, my wife and I celebrated our 2nd wedding anniversery. No problems there, we had a lovely time, and I actually remembered and bought her a nice necklace and card, we dressed up and went to dinner, etc.
BUT, on Wednesday night...
"Honey?"
"Yes, dear?"
"Do you know what today is?"
ARRRRGH! It was instant brain-freeze. You could probably hear the gears stripping off my mental processes, as I tried desperately to throw that train into reverse. Woah, woah, big fella! Go back, go back! What could have happened on this date? WWII ended? Hindenberg exploded? Churchill died? Her mother's birthday? What? What?
Tentatively, WITH FEAR IN MY HEART, I answer..."Wednesday?"
"No, silly. Today is the 2nd anniversery of the first time we slept in this apartment as husband and wife!"
ARGH!!! The PAIN!!! Now that I know the dreaded answer to the dreaded question, it is even worse! Was I supposed to have remembered this? Is there some form of celebration required? A card? A kiss? An expensive gift of some kind involving shiny rocks? A ceremonial dance of some kind? More clashing of gears, brain cells that I can ill-afford to lose dropping over dead, clutching their tiny chests in agony. I see lights flashing in eyes, I break out in a cold sweat...
At this point, my wife (bless her) noticed the glazed look on my face and my sudden loss of balance, and began to laugh.
Yes, let's laugh. Much better than you being mad at me, dear.
Ahahahaha.
Oh Dear God, my heart can't take this...
This question, to me, has become the second-worst question that a man can ever hear - right after "Do you think this dress makes me look fat?"
Best Regards,
Bill Mattocks
BUT, on Wednesday night...
"Honey?"
"Yes, dear?"
"Do you know what today is?"
ARRRRGH! It was instant brain-freeze. You could probably hear the gears stripping off my mental processes, as I tried desperately to throw that train into reverse. Woah, woah, big fella! Go back, go back! What could have happened on this date? WWII ended? Hindenberg exploded? Churchill died? Her mother's birthday? What? What?
Tentatively, WITH FEAR IN MY HEART, I answer..."Wednesday?"
"No, silly. Today is the 2nd anniversery of the first time we slept in this apartment as husband and wife!"
ARGH!!! The PAIN!!! Now that I know the dreaded answer to the dreaded question, it is even worse! Was I supposed to have remembered this? Is there some form of celebration required? A card? A kiss? An expensive gift of some kind involving shiny rocks? A ceremonial dance of some kind? More clashing of gears, brain cells that I can ill-afford to lose dropping over dead, clutching their tiny chests in agony. I see lights flashing in eyes, I break out in a cold sweat...
At this point, my wife (bless her) noticed the glazed look on my face and my sudden loss of balance, and began to laugh.
Yes, let's laugh. Much better than you being mad at me, dear.
Ahahahaha.
Oh Dear God, my heart can't take this...
This question, to me, has become the second-worst question that a man can ever hear - right after "Do you think this dress makes me look fat?"
Best Regards,
Bill Mattocks